Destination Wedding?? Make it happen!

Planning a Destination Wedding

What's the most romantic thing you can think of? Is it a seaside wedding on a Caribbean beach? Or maybe you'd prefer to say your vows in a cozy little church in the Tuscan countryside. How about being married by the captain of a cruise ship somewhere in the South Seas? 

Everyone dreams about their fantasy wedding, but few make their dreams a reality. This is a shame, because planning a destination wedding doesn't have to be any harder than planning a hometown church wedding. In fact, it can even be easier. 

Picking a Location

The first step seems the most straightforward, but is probably the most difficult: deciding where to go. You may already have your dream destination in mind, but there are several questions to answer before you get those invitations printed up. First of all, you may be excited about traveling to an exotic land, but what about your guests? Destination weddings are ideal if you come from a family of travelers, or if your guests are coming from scattered parts of the world anyway. But do give some consideration to the possibility, no matter how remote, that not everyone on your guest list has a week to devote to your wedding, likes to fly, and keeps their passport up-to-date at all times. 

If you realize that only a few devoted friends would be up for a trip to your exotic dream location, all is not lost. It just means a little compromise is in order. The United States is full of romantic and even exotic locations that don’t require a passport and lots of money. Hawaii is an obvious choice, but be creative. Ask yourself what's most important to you. Are you dead set on getting married in Tahiti, or is it the general idea of a beach wedding that floats your boat? I've heard from clients, neighbors, friends and coworkers who've had weddings in less common but beautiful places like Catalina Island, Montana, the Colorado Rockies, and the Garden District of New Orleans. Ask around, do a little research, and keep your mind open about destinations. 

Budget, of course, is a consideration. When the wedding's over, you will already be in your honeymoon destination, so you may not mind the cost of traveling to the wedding. Your guests may feel differently. But remember that further away doesn't necessarily mean more expensive. During the winter, travel to sunny Florida can be more expensive than getting to Europe, which empties of tourists after October. Pick your budget, gauge your guests' budget, and then spend some time researching prices. You probably know that tickets are usually less expensive if you plan ahead--be sure your guests know that, too. People on the invite list might also appreciate if you sent them a list of local hotels in various price ranges, and information about rental cars, as well.

Getting Married in a Foreign Country

So you’ve decided to get married abroad? This will add a few small but important steps to your wedding preparations. 

The first question many ask when planning an overseas wedding is whether or not their marriage will be legally recognized in the United States. The answer, at least for heterosexual couples, is almost always yes. Any marriage between a man and a woman that's legal in a foreign country is legal at home. (Same-sex couples won't find that the United States recognizes their union, even if it's conducted in a country such as Sweden or Denmark where gay marriage is legal.) 

One thing to be sure to check on, though, is whether or not the person conducting your ceremony is legally qualified to marry you. It's rare that someone would try to dupe a visitor, but you definitely don't want any misunderstandings on this point. 

If you're getting married abroad, be sure to check on residency requirements. Many countries require that couples arrive early enough that their marriage announcement can be posted at city hall prior to the event. This quaint custom usually means you only have to arrive a day or two ahead of time—a good idea in any case. The residency requirement is quite strict in some countries, however—France, for example, requires both parties to reside in France at least 40 days before the wedding. Don’t get caught by surprise. Contact an embassy or consulate of your destination country well in advance so you know what the rules are. 

You will probably also have to prove that you are eligible to marry in your home country. If you have never been married before, this simply means carrying passports and birth certificates proving that you and your intended are of legal age. If you have been married before, however, you will need documentation proving that you have been either widowed or divorced--that means carrying either a death certificate or divorce decree, ideally the original copies. 

You may also be asked to take a blood test. Be sure to verify ahead of time whether or not this step is required. A foreign embassy or consulate should be able to tell you this, too. 

Hurdles like these are part of the reason U.S. territories such as Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands are so popular for weddings—they feel exotic and foreign, but legally, getting married there is just like getting married in any U.S. state. 

Leave the Details to Someone Else

There are ways around many of the logistical problems of a wedding abroad. One is to consider getting married on a cruise ship. Cruises are less expensive than you might think, and a major advantage is that the cruise line can take care of finding a qualified minister and a place for the ceremony. They've even got the exotic location taken care of. 

Similarly, all-inclusive resorts are also a great place to get married, whether in the States or abroad. The idea behind an all-inclusive vacation package is that all food and beverage charges (and tips) are included in one flat rate paid up front. This generally means that special events--even, unbelievably, weddings--can be celebrated for no extra cost. Just call ahead, and the resort will take care of providing a minister, photographer, cake, and even witnesses.

One final note on wedding planning: If you're a woman planning on taking your husband's name, don't be too quick to try out that new moniker. It will cause headaches at the airport if your tickets show your married name but your passport was issued in your maiden name. Make all reservations in your maiden name and save the new one for when you get home.